God I don’t know why this happened and what your plan is for my life but I know that your word is true. Help me to trust you more. Help me to not be afraid. Lord, I know that you who began a good work in me is faithful to complete it. I know you didn’t cause the destruction of my marriage and that you can make good out of bad”. At first I struggled through work every day but God blessed me there also by giving me a spirit filled on fire for God boss. He prayed over me, counseled me, encouraged me and loved me with the love of God. I would go to work and see God’s love shining at me through his eyes.
I began to read the New Testament page by page and chapter by chapter and God continued to amaze me. I would read or study something and the pastor would preach the same thing I was reading that next Sunday. It went on like that for weeks and through that I began to believe that God really did care about me and that there was nothing I could do to make him stop loving me. God loves us so much. I can remember Ms Lorna telling me several times while I was working at RMI that I needed to get out of my head and into my heart and I just didn’t get it. Well, I finally got it.
When you have lost everything that you thought was real in your life and you don’t know which way to turn, God will be there and all you have to do is reach out to him and he will strengthen you and lift you up and fill you with his love. About a month after I left my husband, I was feeling alone, helpless and hopeless. I went home to my room of boxes, put on my CD player full of praise and worship music and laid on my bed. He listened to the promises being sung and through tears of praise I let Jesus truly touch my heart. An hour after I laid down I got up a different person and from then on I really heard God speak to me through his word, through other Christians, through his praise and worship. God is truly my comforter, my provider, my healer, my way maker, my peace and my joy.